Snake Oil: Filthy Rich Writer

Right off the bat, I have to say I am not a fan of the expression 'filthy rich' because it suggests that riches are dirty. That being rich is a bad thing. Wealth is a tool, and tools can be used for good or bad purposes. Generally speaking, I think wealth is good and I suspect it would be a losing and futile search for me to find anyone to disagree.

My post today is inspired by an ad which appeared in my Facebook Newsfeed. (I'm aware of the contradiction. A slightly oxymoronic use of ad and news together.) The headline of the ad is 'Filthy Rich Writer' and it's an invitation for people with spare time on their hands, stuck at home due to COVID lockdowns or some other reason, to write content for websites and make a lot of money.

Snake Oil.

If you've written anything, then you know why this ad is obviously false. It's especially false for ghostwriters, who can make money, but rarely heaps of it.

Since losing my job as Lead Teacher with a not for profit Registered Training Organization, I have been concentrating on establishing a new career as a freelance writer. With six novels, and scores of published short stories under my belt, I'm not a novice writer, but as a freelancer, I'm starting from scratch. Freelancers mostly ghostwrite articles, stories and books for their clients. Most of these clients seem to be 'middle men' who sell content written by others to their own clients. Pay rates range from around half a cent per word up to 2 cents per word. So, a 1000 word article at half a cent per word pays $5. Do you know how long it takes to write a 1000 word article on a subject with which you are unfamiliar? Even at two cents per word, you're talking about an hourly pay rate of about $15. Filthy rich? (writer chokes on a mouthful of tea).

For my next post, I'm gong to write about the two platforms that I currently use to find freelance work. Upwork and Freelancer. My experience with these two has been mixed. I'm getting work, but I'm missing out on a lot of jobs as well. Why? I have no idea, but I suspect it comes down to money. Doesn't everything, come down to money in the end.

Platforms like Freelancer, Upwork and Fiverr are not charities. They are businesses. The primary aim of most businesses is to make money, not to help people. Not to make other people rich, but to make themselves rich.

No one who bought and read the book Three Easy Steps to Unimaginable Wealth got rich. You know who got rich? The author of the book did, because he preyed on people's laziness and greed, making ridiculous promises about how easy it is to get rich, in order to make money for himself.

Wise writers, who've been around for a while, know that 90% of services offered to writers to help them write and sell books, are, in fact, only designed to make money for those providing the services. That guy on Fiverr, who's a book marketing genius, makes extravagant promises about how many people will find out about your book. You pay your $20, which covers hidden costs only added in after you're committed, and get nothing but a screenshot of an anonymous Twitter account which mentions the title of your book but doesn't have a purchase link.

Less than one percent of writers get rich, and they don't even have to be good writers to do it. Lots of good writers do earn a reasonable living though, and I aim to be one of them. I love writing, and am enjoying the challenge of a being a freelancer which offers many opportunities to write in genres apart from those with which I am comfortable. It's stretching me, improving my skills, but I'm not going to get rich.

Honestly, a think the ambition to get rich is unworthy of humanity. If riches come, thank God. If they don't, thank God. It's not my goal to get rich. Of course I want to earn a good living and consequently have a degree of financial freedom, but wealth is not the goal. My goal is to connect with people and to make a positive contribution to the world. 

I reckon if you make love your goal, you will always be richly rewarded.

A Dog's Eye: The Ultimate Investment

I didn't read The Barefoot Investor from cover to cover, but I still reviewed it and I'll
explain why. I didn't read it all because not all of it is relevant to me at the moment. I gave it a five star review because it rings true. Despite the failings it shares with all self help books, it has an undeniable credibility. It is also inspirational, funny and very practical. This is the kind of book you buy and read through, then re visit those sections of most interest depending on where you are at. Later, you'll pull it off the shelf and dive in for some more wisdom from someone who clearly knows what he's talking about. I felt really encouraged after reading The Barefoot Investor. If you're a bit messed up with your money -most people are- get yourself a copy.

It's probably a timing thing...it's definitely a timing thing for me. I added this book to my 'to read' list two and half years ago when I was in the middle of a financial crisis. I didn't read it then, but as I had hit rock bottom, I sought help elsewhere, entering into a Part 9 debt agreement with a debt consolidation company. The type of company which Scott Pape doesn't endorse, mainly because they charge a lot for the service. It cost me over five thousand dollars in fees to have this company help me, but it has been worth every cent.

I was never good with money and the yardstick by which I measured success was how often I struggled. For most of my adult life, I have just gotten buy. Always having to make decisions based on the cheapest option, or whether a particular purchase was necessary or not. Saying no more often than yes, and much more often than I wanted to. I learned quite late that I was a stingy person. I had inherited, or absorbed by observation, the parsimony of my father. I also made selfish decisions about how to use my money, some of which had terrible consequences. I am still living with the consequences of those choices.

Over the years, I've learned two major lessons about money.

1. I am called to be generous, not stingy. There are many verses in the Bible which speak against stinginess, but when I read this one, I was convicted. Years and years of calling myself a good steward of money, and being careful, covered up a mean spirit.

"One person is generous and grows all the more wealthy, but another withholds more than he should and comes to poverty."                                                  (Proverbs 11:24)

2. God is my provider. When I lost my job in 2018 and was down to my last two hundred dollars, I recall looking in the mirror, and seeing the anxiety written on my face. God spoke to me, asking a simple question: 'Do you trust me?' For most of my working life, I worked for wages: regular pay deposited into my account. My lifeblood. The second great lesson I learned when I answered God's question honestly with a 'no', was that Christ is my lifeblood. After confessing that my trust was not in God, but in my job, I decided to really trust God instead of just saying that I did. Very soon afterwards, I got a job; a very good job in which I am still employed.

"My God will supply all your needs according to his riches in Christ Jesus."     (Philippians 4:1)

How does this post about financial security connect with Christmas. Simple really. Among other things, Christmas is a celebration of giving. We celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ, God's greatest gift to mankind: the messiah, the saviour. His was the ultimate investment; an investment in people. In us, his children. This investment is a gift which keeps on giving because God is so generous.

The Barefoot Investor speaks only very briefly about the virtue of generosity, but it is in fact the true key to financial freedom. God is generous and we should be too.

Snake Oil: Two monumental lies

I believed two lies which informed my life practice for decades, underpinning every decision I made. I learned these things indirectly, by observation and experience, and in the case of one of them, I was so deceived that I didn't even realize I was enslaved to a false and harmful philosophy. Both parsimony and lasciviousness ruled me as secret tyrants.

While these powerful, yet hidden lessons controlled me, I proclaimed my normalcy. It is not an unusual thing for a man to be careful with money, especially if he has a family to support. Saying no is a crucial sign of strength. It is also quite normal for a man to be frequently having inappropriate thoughts of a sexual nature, and even acting out these thoughts in some way. Saying yes is a crucial sign of strength. I learned these things from my father.

1. A man is not generous. He is stingy and controlling.
2. A woman is a thing for a man's pleasure. In sexual matters, a man does not deny himself, and women should accept that.

To be fair, Dad improved with age. he mellowed and became a better man. When he died, I lost one of my best friends. I still miss him and the great friendship we built over my lifetime, through many challenges. But dad taught me to be mean with money and to objectify women. 

I believe I was in my forties when I read this verse in the Bible: "One gives freely, yet grows all the richer, another withholds what he should give and only suffers want." (Proverbs 11:24)  I had considered myself a good steward of money, prudent and sensible, but upon reading this verse God told me I was stingy. I have been working on becoming more generous ever since.

In 2015 with my marriage over, partially as a result of infidelity on my part, I was sitting in church when an ad popped up on the big screen during the announcements segment. Upon hearing that this course, called Valiant Man, was about sexual discipleship, I felt God wanted me to do it. The course switched the lights on, exposing my slavery to the god of sex, and ever since I have been working on becoming a better man, a purer man, an honorable man who respects women.

One of the things I learned in the course was the value of emotional honesty and humility. Recognizing my behaviour in the arenas of 
money and sex, I had to admit I was a long way short of where I wanted to be. I wanted to understand myself and I wanted to change. I wanted, and I still want truth to change me.

In the individualistic and hyper-eroticized West, money and sex have become weaponized commodities. The great lie is that this is okay. This is the lie I believed most of my life because my father lived it out in front of me. I swallowed the snake oil, but I didn't know any better, nor did he. Now I've spat it out and rejected the lie.

relationDips: rules of engagement (culinary)

Anarchists feel that rules are like prison bars, so do rebellious teenagers. There is something of the rebel in all of us: it's human nature. However, most of us learn to accept rules and acknowledge that, paradoxically, although they do impose restrictions, they also provide freedom.

For example, I feel safe and free when I drive because of the road rules, and my faith that the majority of my fellow motorists know the rules and obey them. We all bend these rules to some extent, but generally we acquiesce to the order they impose.

Relationships require rules. They may seldom be called rules, and are often spoken negotiated agreements rather than codified laws, but they are invariably established within all relationships. Sometimes, they just happen as in one person's reaction to the other's breach of an unspoken rule which results in an apology and a promise to "never do that again". At other times, they are more purposefully constructed. A person entering a second marriage will want to discuss the issues which contributed to the demise of their first marriage in an effort to make sure the mistakes of the past are not repeated.

My wife and I discussed big issues like money, sex and parenting before we married. It was the second time around for both of us and we each wanted to ensure that we understood the other's expectations. An early obstacle for us was religion. I'm a protestant Christian and she is a Roman Catholic Christian. Despite our mutual faith in Christ, we had to deal with the matter of church rules versus the teaching of the Bible. We agreed to be tolerant, and not to force each other. We agreed to disagree about somethings. For example, the Catholic rule which prevents my devoted wife from ever taking communion because she is a divorcee. I strongly disagree with this church rule, but I respect my wife's right to accept it. This has become a "rule" in our relationship which we both understand and adhere to, and within which we are free and feel safe. She knows I will not go on about it, nor criticize her or force her to do something about it.

Another catholic church rule which is not Biblical is abstaining from meat on Fridays. I understand this is a mark of respect for Christ who was crucified on a Friday. However, my understanding of the Bible is that we are free to eat whatever we want to, whenever we want to. Peter's vision is instructive, but Paul adds some words about food in relation to respecting other people which also need to be taken into consideration.

In the continued search for more common ground, I decided to not eat meat on Fridays. It makes very little difference to me. Even though I eat meat almost everyday, I considered it an inconsequential sacrifice. My wife was overjoyed at this simple gesture. It is now something we do together to demonstrate our mutual faith in Christ, and to show respect to our Saviour and to each other. By doing this, I am being respectful rather than just talking about being respectful.

I eat well and regularly. My example has influenced her to not skip meals. I used to eat sandwiches and drink Coke everyday. Under her gentle influence, I have reduced my Coke consumption by half and dropped one of my lunch time sandwiches for a hot meal. Some of these changes were negotiated and others have just happened as result of the time we have spent together, positively impacting on each other's lives.

My wife once told me that she didn't like rules. At the time, I challenged her about this, but have since accepted it is not true, not as a blanket statement anyway. I don't go on about it. This is another example of one of our rules, but we don't need to be explicit about its existence. A good set of rules should just operate in the background, underpinning the relationship.

To finish I return to Paul's words:

Romans 14:3 "The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not everything must not judge the one who does, for God accepts both."

I  think this is an excellent culinary rule for healthy relationships, and by extension an admirable goal for relationships in general. What say you?

Snake Oil: make your own rules

Despite the astronomically small chance of winning the major prize, a massive number of people continue to religiously invest in the dream of future wealth by buying lottery tickets. I think I bought a few a long time ago, but these days my 'gambling' is restricted to an NRL footy tipping competition which doubles as a fundraiser for the Multiple Sclerosis Society.

Naturally, advertising for the various versions of the pick the lucky numbers game doesn't mention how heavily the odds are stacked against you. It's all about the dream. How your life will change dramatically for the better when you win.

The latest television ad for Powerball is the least appealing one I've ever seen. (I apologize for using the most abused adverb in the English language: 'ever'. I hate what they've done to you poor 'ever'.)

The scene in the ad is a party in a lavish mansion, attended by all manner of unusual and interesting types of people. A song is playing. The repeating line is there's a beast inside you. A guy shows up at the end to deliver the tag, the catchphrase. Powerball: play by your own rules.

So when I am rich, I can make up my own rules? Hmmm...aren't the rich already doing that to some extent? Haven't they always done that? Won't they always do that? Do you want to join them? I want in. I want to be a member of the wealthy and powerful elite for whom money is the answer to every problem. It's probably enough that you can go to fancy parties, isn't it? That's all I need. I need money, and a truckload of it, so I can live the lifestyle of the rich and famous, and make my own rules...and go to parties.

Let's all make up our own rules, and hope the values we hold which will necessarily underpin those rules, align at least to some degree with the rules of others. I'm sure they will. She'll be right mate.Let's do away with such anachronisms as rule of law. We live in a post modern age so absolutes are for fools. You decide what's true and what's right, and use your millions to make sure any dissent is extinguished.

Play by your own rules? Sounds awesome. I'm off to use all of my disposable income to buy Powerball tickets. Stuff it. I'll go without food this week so I can buy more tickets and increase my chances of winning. It's only a few days until I get paid again, and I desperately want to play by my own rules. Who's with me? 

relationDips 1: e-whores

e-whore: a person who uses sex in some way to persuade men to pay money, or sign up for some online service. They usually target men.

One can see by how many of these fraudsters there are, either there is a lot of money to be made in this "industry", or all these dishonest and devious people involved in such exploits are stupid.

Truth be told there is no shortage of stupidity on both sides: victims and perpetrators. 

I understand why men get sucked in by these deceptions. I too have been sucked in. Eventually I worked out what was going on as I noticed certain commonalities among the women who followed me on Twitter, then said hello, then told me a bunch of lies before asking for money, usually in the form of an iTunes or Amazon gift card. Why they ask for those particular methods of payment is a still a mystery to me.

Fantasy plays a big part in this whole sorry business. E-whores appeal to weakness. By using flattery and provocative photos, they quickly catch the attention of many men, who will, despite knowing better in most cases, play the game. Why? Because the game meets a need.

The problem is that such frivolous and fraudulent encounters do nothing to satisfy deep emotional needs. This form of counterfeit intimacy is what Dr Allen Meyer calls "junk sex". In just the same way as junk food meets the immediate need of satisfying hunger, but leaves one soon disappointed and hungry, as well as malnourished, junk sex is a cheap substitute for real emotional intimacy.

Believe it or not men who indulge in this online behaviour are not primarily driven by a desire for sex. It's much more complicated than that.

If a man in your life is trapped in this roundabout of addictive behaviour, try to get him to talk about his motives, and show him mercy. Leave your judges cap in the closet. Most likely he doesn't like what he's doing either.

Real relationships, honest and transparent ones with genuine people, are real food for our souls. The search for intimacy continues...

NB: I usually include images in my posts, but for obvious reasons this time I did not.

A Tale of Disappointment

Over the last couple of years, I've racked up a little credit debt, both through carelessness and recklessness, but my Darwin sojourn is largely about rectifying this self imposed financial mire.

Recently a few lights appeared in the distance, on the highway to Christmas, which gave me a little hope.

I thought I was in line to receive some back pay from my former employer, and a financial company offered me a very good debt consolidation package. These two combined, or even one or the other would have made things a lot easier for me. Then a third opportunity popped up which would have allowed me to move some of my debt onto a temporary interest free credit card.

Things were looking up. I would be comfortably able to handle Christmas and receive a boost to my already accelerated debt reduction program.

Then, my former employer decided I was ineligible for the back pay because I left before the arbitrary cut off date they selected. I missed out by a month. The finance company revised their offer to less than half of the original offer despite rabid assurances from the salesperson. The new offer effectively rendered the arrangement useless, and of no benefit to me so I told them to 'never again darken my doorway.' Finally the credit card company which pre-approved my application (as did the finance company) advised me, after I was on hold for twenty minutes, and was further subjected to a ridiculous set of questions (see below), that my application had been denied.

So, I'm back to square one. Oh well. At least, I know I'm on the right track.

Here is the aformentioned conversation:

Bank representative: Do you have an account with us?

Me: No. I'm a new customer. I received pre-approval for a new credit card.

Bank rep: Do you have a credit card with us?

Me: (I sigh and repeat what I just said.)

Bank rep: I need to ask you some security questions, if the answers don't match...blah, blah, blah.

Me: No problem.

Bank rep: Can you tell about the last transaction you made, either to or from your account?

Me: I don't have any accounts.

Bank rep: Can you tell me how many different types of accounts you have with us?

Me: I don't have any accounts.

Bank rep: Can you tell me the name of the branch where your account is held?

Me: I don't have any accounts.

Bank rep: Your answers do not match what we have in our system. You will have to attend a branch to verify your identity.