A Welcome Forgetfulness

From the moment I said good-bye at the airport on August 5 to begin the new Darwin chapter of my life, I began dreaming of my return home for Christmas. As hard as I tried to not wish my life away, I could not resist the emotional pull of family and familiarity. And so, it was with joyful expectation that I counted the months, the weeks, the days and finally the hours until I packed my suitcase and headed for the airport.

It is said that three weeks is an ideal length of time for a holiday. The first week is winding down, the second relaxing, and the third gearing up. I haven't had enough holidays of more than a couple of days duration to properly test this theory, and this time has not been at all normal, but I'm beginning to feel something. Today is day 10 of my holiday-the half way point, and a vague forgetfulness is creeping over me.

The alarm has not, but once, rudely interrupted me from slumber. I have driven my XR6, which I missed, everywhere I needed to go, but the imperative to go has diminished. I eat and drink whatever I want whenever I want - late dinners, early lunches, multiple lunches. Planning for the day happens that morning or maybe the night before. I don't exercise except for spontaneous walks around the beach at Kiama or bicycle rides. There is nothing I have to do. No place I have to go.

I can almost not remember that I live in Darwin, that I have a job there and that I don't know when I will return home for good. The memory of strict routines, buses, gym work outs and continually oppressive heat have faded. The loneliness, and the symptoms of Hug Deprivation Syndrome have disappeared. I feel lazy and unenergetic, and I'm happy to go with that because I am on holiday. I can almost forget that I'll never see my dad again.

It's a beautiful sunny morning. We'll probably go to the beach, but we don't have to. I'll watch some more cricket on TV, swimming in the languid sea of rest, falling all over the lounge in various positions of repost. I might even have a beer before lunch. I don't have any real plans. I'm in week 2 of my break, and I feel calmer than I have for quite some time. To achieve this tranquility means choosing to forget, but not in the sense of not remembering; it's more like letting go.

Photo sources:
http://www.qantasnewsroom.com.au/media-releases/qantas-dreamliners-symbolise-new-era-for-national-carrier/
http://www.illawarramercury.com.au/story/2980957/sharks-spotted-feeding-in-kiama-photos/mer/
http://www.kotaku.com.au/2014/04/the-big-question-winter-or-sum

L is for Lazing About

L is for Lazing Around

“After a week of lounging around his apartment, watching movies, eating and drinking too much, Mark decided he needed a change of scenery. The prospect of a long rest with nothing to do, no place to be, no uniform to wear, and no orders to follow had seemed very appealing until boredom gate crashed his party.

He rolled over and stared at the clock. It was six thirty, and so far, his longest sleep in. He stayed in bed longer than he needed to because there was no reason to get up. He was supposed to be recuperating so his indolence was entirely justified but it troubled him, nonetheless. He tossed himself around on the bed, as much as his broken ribs would allow. The odd twinge was all he experienced now. He banged his hand against the bed, then against the pillow. Then he let it fall rather than thrusting it down. He squeezed his hand, bent his legs.”   from chapter 6, Ashmore Grief

If you are an active person, if your life is full of numerous activities and responsibilities which  demand your attention, your time and your energy, then you need a vacation. If you are such a person who frets over time wasted, and the inefficient use of resources then you need to chill. You push hard to cram as much as you can into your twenty four hours whilst always wishing for an extension, and you need to achieve your goals, to get things done. You have a to do list, and you motivate yourself with self improvement quotes. You love to work. Paid work, voluntary work, any sort of work. You are always on the go, and you can find time for everything.

It makes me tired just thinking about it. Rest is severely underrated by people like you, and I know because there is a little bit of you in me. I’m fighting it because I don’t want to live life at one hundred miles an hour. I don’t want to be so driven that I cannot enjoy anything. Cliche alert: I want to be able to stop and smell the roses. I’m learning to relax. I’m learning to appreciate quietness and slowness.

Take a vacation, and if it’s been a while since your last one, then make it a long one. Unwind. Relax. Enjoy. It may be very difficult, as it was for Mark in Ashmore Grief, who liked the idea but found the practice of rest uncomfortable and unsatisfying, but please try. If you work hard, you deserve rest. Don’t begrudge yourself this simple pleasure.

Photo source:

http://benralston.blogspot.com.au/2010/05/relaxation-1-what-is-relaxation.html