I've been writing for 16 years and I'm still wandering around in the forest of anonymity. I'm used to rejection. I've become very philosophical about it because I believe that I am a good writer. When an editor rejects my work, they are voicing their opinion, and that is all. If they offer some constructive criticism, which is rare, I take it on board, and then I send my work to someone else. If they say nothing, or offer some generic 'thanks, but no thanks', I send my work to someone else. I keep looking for the editor who 'gets' me. The one who reads my writing and says: 'I like this. This is good. This works for me.' I'm looking for that person right now.
No, it's not the rejection that bothers me as such. It's the process. Find a suitable publisher, read their submission guidelines, put together a submissions package to meet their requirements, send it, then wait. There are a few publishers who unfairly do not accept simultaneous submissions, but the majority understand that, given some quite long response times, it is reasonable for writers to reach out to as many publishers as possible, as quickly as possible. The query process is a rolling sales pitch.
It's time consuming, and somewhat annoying due to the diverse submissions criteria of various publishers. I understand why some of them are so exacting. With so many submissions coming in, they have to use whatever means available to sort the wheat from the chaff, and to make it as easy as possible for themselves.
Time consumed by querying, means less time for writing. I'm pretty confident of finding a publisher, but feel no less anxiety as I send each query off on a wing and a prayer. I wonder when. I wonder who. I wonder if this time, I will break free from the prison of obscurity. Wish me luck.