Nuts are a kind of food. There are many different kinds of nuts...Hey, wake up! This is interesting. Snickers, the nut filled chocolate bar which really satisfies has just been released in a new version. The latest in an insanely long line of Snickers varieties is a yellow packet version. Mars confectionery, bless their hearts, after trying once to boost sales of the popular snack with a king sized version, and then again with an extra nuts edition, now want us to try Snickers with three nuts. I don't know if this marketing has been successful or not, nor do I know whether the marketing gurus at Mars and the boffins who make the budgetary decisions are courageous or crazy. Successful or not, I think they are all nuts.
With apologies to North American readers who are used to multiple varieties of everything, I must say I just can't see the need for trying to improve Snickers. It's always been a favourite of mine because it really satisfies, and it helps me feel more like myself as opposed to grouchy like Joe Pesci, or wussy like Betty White. Australia did not even receive the Snickers blessing until 1977 which was 47 years after the sensational product hit the stores in the U.S., and 50 years after it was invented. Who says Australia isn't behind the rest of the world? The point is though, the Snickers bar was three years in the making. That's 1095 days of tinkering and fine tuning the original product to get it spot on. I reckon it's perfect. Just the right size, exactly the right amount of nuts, and precisely the right kind of nut: the peanut. It doesn't need to be improved.
However, changing the ingredients and/or the packaging is necessary according to Mars, and it does provide at least an initial boost to sales simply because people are curious. One of the human characteristics which is mercilessly targetted by advertisers is our curiousity, the other is our greed. We've already got the perfect chocolate bar, Snickers, but they say, let's try to improve it because we need to sell more units. Well, I'm not falling for it this time. Call me courageous or call me crazy but I am going to boycott Snickers as a personal protest. Are you with me?
To encourage participation in my futile little protest, I am offering a free copy of my short story Yummy. Just e-mail me and ask for it.